Review of LG Flatron W2252TQ Widescreen Monitor

I like ultrawide monitors. They give me more space to work on and usually perform better with movies and they definitely give me an edge when playing games. That’s why I grabbed the LG Flatron W2252TQ from the stock room when our new editorial computers came along as testing it gave me the perfect excuse to catch up on some of movies and games I’ve missed since I last picked up a mouse in anger.
I’m not a fan of the ordinary black/gray drab corporate designs of typical LCD displays, and thankfully, the Flatron W2252TQ looks good, with smooth, rounded edges mated with a glossy black surface. All of the connections for the Flatron W2252TQ are located on near the bottom of the unit, so as not to disturb the smooth gloss black surface on the back. The power switch for this 22-inch display is located at the lower left, while the adjustment controls are on the lower right. The monitor offers several viewing modes (internet, movie, normal, user-defined and demo). The Flatron W2252TQ only has two connections-DVI and D-sub, which is disappointing, since the display can theoretically support HD resolutions.

Setting up the monitor takes about five minutes and does not need extraneous tools. Everything snaps happily into place. You can adjust the tilt of the monitor a few degrees up and down; sadly, it won’t rotate easily as there is no hinge for that. One nice feature of the Flatron W2252TQ is when you switch viewing modes-it allows you to view the difference of the viewing modes via a half and half approach-the right side of the screen shows you your current selection while the left side of the screen shows a preview of the scene mode, allowing you to judge the difference right away. You can tweak pretty much everything related to the performance of the Flatron W2252TQ including color temperature, color levels for green, red and blue, brightness, contrast and gamma. There’s even special screen effects like black and white, sepia and Gaussian blur, but why you’d want to use this is beyond me.

The Flatron W2252TQ’s performance is pretty good, with excellent color reproduction all around. It’s Digital Fine Contrast (LG’s version of Dynamic Contrast) ratio of 10000:1 did its part well-as the fade to black for the monitor was pretty fast during our test. I also used the Flatron W2252TQ extensively with games where its 2-millisecond response time proved its worth-I did not notice any significant ghosting effects during my extended gaming sessions. Probably the only complaints I have is the unit’s hard to use controls-it took me a good 20 minutes before I could properly calibrate the thing.

How to Play Game Boy Advance Games on Your Computer

Do you miss playing the Game Boy Advance and the Game Boy SP? Well, I will show you exactly how to play them on your computer! You are only minutes away from playing some popular Game Boy Advance titles such as, Pokemon Ruby, or Super Mario Advance 2.
You need an Emulator
An emulator is a tool that can act like a Game Boy Advance. You need to download a good emulator so that the games you play on it have good sound, graphics, and everything else a real Game boy Advance would have and need. Start by going to Google and searching, ‘game boy advance emulator’. Once type correctly, you it should take you to this website called, emulator zone. This website gives a list of emulators. I personally recommend that you download the Visual Boy Advance 1.8.0 Beta3 because it is the best one. So download it already!

You need some ROMs
Now you need some ROMs. A ROM is an actual game file. Without ROMs, your new emulator that you just downloaded in the previous step is useless. Go to Google and search for a website to download some Game boy Advance ROMs. If you have one in particular, search for it on the search box that’s above the screen. Once it you have it downloaded, you are almost ready to play same game boy advance games! If you are feeling extra spicy then you could go for a more modern game like Pokemon Heart Gold ROM.

You Need to Extract ALL files
You need to extract all .zip files because some games might not work properly. Even the Visual Boy Advance 1.8.0 Beta3 that you already downloaded should be extracted. Once you extract the game ROM files and your Game boy Advance Emulator, you’re almost set to go!

You need to open up the Emulator and drag the ROM to It
Open up the emulator. It should show a blank, black screen. This is where you will drag the ROM file. It should get started and WAH-LAH you should be playing your desired Game Boy Advance. To learn the buttons and things like that, read the Readme.txt file from the Visual Boy Advance. Good luck!

Is the 13 Day Diet Just Hype?

Each and every day, someone switches diets or starts a new crazy diet, but whatever happened to partaking in simple and easy to follow diets? Seems like everyone is quite to jump on the bandwagon when a new diet comes out, but they neglect the basics of what a diet is, so it’s all in vain at the end. Today I want to take it back to the basics with the 13 Day Diet.

Before we jump in, it’s painfully obvious that I am not some sort of nutritional expert, and if you want to learn the literal specifics of the 13 Day Diet then you can read more about it here:

  • What Exactly is This Diet About?

This diet became widely popular because it was one of the first metabolism diet plans that got a lot of hype. The whole premise is that this diet will help speed up your metabolism, which in turn will help you keep the pounds off. Over the course of 13 days, you are supposed to stick to a strict regime that will shock your metabolism into acting differently than before.

  • Does it Work?

Even though I can’t speak from personal experience, on paper it all makes sense. Essentially, if you are intaking less calories than before, then it’s a win in my book. The diet plan does promise that participants will lose weight, but I still think the main takeaway is that your metabolism rate can be changed for a long time. So even if you didn’t lose weight, but still changed your metabolism, then you have a chance to move onto a less strict diet and have continued success.

  • Any Downsides?

As with any diet, of course there are a couple negative aspects. The first is the radical change to such a strict diet. If you’re used to eating all day everyday, then you are in for quite the surprise with this diet. Also, the diet isn’t even really sustainable outside of the allotted 13 days, because it doesn’t include basic nutrients that you need to stay healthy. For some participants, a moral support group is suggested so that you can stay motivated and stay on track.

To sum up, I look at the 13 Day Diet as a stepping stone. Sure it promises great results from just completing the diet, but the real reward is being able to live a different life with this newly-balanced metabolism. So even if you didn’t achieve the weight loss you hoped for, you can use your new and improved metabolism rate to take-on another diet and shed even more weight.

Birthstones: Which One Looks the Best

Whether or not you believe in the power and the hype around birthstones, you have to admit they still look cool. The fact that they are pretty popular makes it so that you don’t look like a freak when wearing some jewelry that has some. We all know what our own birthstone is for our month, and if you don’t know then you should look up a birthstone colors guide before reading further. Below are my top 3 favorite birthstones

  1. The Diamond – An iconic classic and the most popular of all the birthstones, it’s no surprise that the diamond is at the top of my list. It’s look and style is timeless and looks good with anything. The crazy part is that diamonds even come in different colors, it doesn’t always have to be the typical clear look. The reputation and versatility of this April birthstone simply places it in a tier above all the other stones.
  2. The Ruby – This stone ranges from pink to red, so it’s obvious why I would like it. Rubies were once believed to bring good luck to anyone that wore it, but nowadays it’s more of a symbol for love and passion. However you view it, it’s no doubt that this is a head-turner stone that is a sure conversation starter.
  3. The Emerald – A stunning green gem that represents faith, wisdom, and success, the emerald is a bold looking stone. Some may be worried that green doesn’t go well with many outfits, but the truth it you should just let the stone speak for itself and forget about how well it coordinates with your current theme. People are going to say, “Wow that emerald is stunning” not, “Wow that green thing doesn’t match your shoelaces.”

At the end of the day, these birthstones are just a reflection of yourself. If you feel like wearing a certain one then go for it. Wear what makes you happy and wave goodbye to the haters in style.

What the Hell is Anyway?

Just like how Vine works, users (or “Musers”) record short, fifteen second videos that loop while music plays in the background. To make a post, the user is prompted with a choice to either choose from the app’s available library, or from the user’s personal music located on the device.

Since every other social network app has a “story” feature, it’s only right that does too. What is interesting about stories on this app is that it can combine 4 separate videos in one, essentially creating a one minute video. Similar to Instagram, the essential way to engage with content is by either liking or commenting, and users are able to follow each other to be alerted about new content. There are even some sites that offer free musical ly followers so that your account can look more popular.

What really sets apart from the pack is the duet feature, which basically allows the the app users to create content together, regardless of their location. Beyond that, users can even host a party, which will get interaction from all your friends instead of just one.

The other side of the app is all about content discovery. The homepage showcases content like trending users with popular videos, most popular songs, “Popular Now” for top videos, and a leaderboard of the most active creators.

The search page of the app reflects that of Twitter’s by displaying the top trending tags. This gives users a general idea of what is hot at the moment. This page may also include some contests that are being run at the moment, that go along with the current trending tags.

What Is Fun to Do With the Family?

I am a huge fan of family getogethers and getting to see all of my siblings, cousins, and of course my dear parents. Of course, one issue that I keep running into is what the hell are we all supposed to do together? Are we just going to sit around and watch a movie? Or just hang around the living room and chat all day? Either way, both of those activities will lead to family bickering. I find myself constantly in search for the most fun family activities, especially when kids are around, but I still am not sure what the best activity is.

One thing we’ve tried lately is to board games. By getting the whole family involved, you can have a gay old time! One reason I love board games is because it has a bit of everything: some friendly competitive juices get flowing between siblings and even parents, and of course, it allows for other elements such as teamwork and working together between different family members. And let’s be honest, there is nothing more enjoyable than having your little brother land on Park Place with 3 hotels on it during a heated game of Monopoly! Or breaking an alliance against your parent in a game of Risk, and sending in 30 soldiers to take over a poorly defended country!

In addition to board games, I also like playing cards. Whether it’s Go Fish, Spades, or even Poker, this is another great thing to do with the fam, no matter the season or time of day.

Are Demolition Companies Profitable?

With the gradual expansion of the construction industry in recent years, we’ve also seen the rise of companies that work hand-in-hand with construction and development companies, like demolition and waste removal services. But when it comes down to time to contract one of these companies, it helps to know how they operate and make money so that you know what to look out for.

Even small-scale companies in the demolition field can turn a decent profit, which is surprising since it only requires a modest-sized investment. Due to the fact that most construction and/or renovation companies rely on subcontracting the work of interior and exterior breakdowns, there are countless opportunities for new or smaller companies to get their foot in the door. If you want to start your own successful demolition company, then we have some basic tips to help you at least get started.

  • With low amounts of start-up capital, it’s usually best to get started in the residential side of demolition.
  • Create a business plan and apply for a business license when you are fully prepared.
  • Obtain the correct amount and type of insurance. The different types of insurance that you need depends on many things like the equipment that you are using.
  • Secure office space and necessary tools/equipment. While it’s possible to start the business from home, you will quickly realize how much an actual office will help you stay organized.
  • Make sure your staff is fully trained and certified. Different aspects of the demolition world require different types of training, and each job should have a group of workers that are familiar with these different rules.
  • Study the local laws and regulations so that you are prepared to apply for certain permits to continue with jobs that you are contracted for.

Each step of the process requires an extensive amount of research, and none of them should be taken lightly. Demolition companies have a lot of pressure on their shoulders to make sure the job is done correctly each and every time, and it does get crazy when dangerous materials have to be handles and disposed of correctly.

Modern Day Weight Loss Plans

Earlier I touched on the fact that people make New Year’s resolutions, but end up abandoning them just like a month later. I for one believe that it has to do with a lack of discipline to carry out an actual plan. Weight loss is not an easy beast to tame, especially if you’ve been strong, unhealthy habits over a long period of time.

I went on to mention how some people may get desperate or lazy and try to find a magic solution to their problem. However, what I didn’t really mention is that instead of searching for some easy solution, you could just as easily find some type of healthy living guide to direct you in the right direction. Take for example one of the most common diet plans out on the web, the 3 Week Diet.

This diet plan was formulated from a health care professional and nutritionist, and not some random guy from the gym. It’s designed to help you obtain your goals by setting up a healthy lifestyle, instead of trying to subject yourself to laborious workouts. You can read about the 3 week diet plan review at and draw your own conclusions if you think something like this would work better than just going in blindly.

Luxury in the Heart of Piccadily

I mentioned a little bit about my travels earlier, highlighting a tranquil area in the countryside, but that really only touches on a tiny percentage of the amazing-ness within India.

I got some time to spend a couple days in the busy city of Chandigarh, which honestly almost feels like being back in the Chicago because of how crazy busy it is and how many people are out and about. The shopping and nightlife also rival that of Chicago. What really surprised me overall is that fact that so many people speak English very well. It was an eye-opening experience to see the difference between being in the country and being in the capital of India.

Even the hotels in the city center have a feeling of luxury and being upscale. Among all the 4 and 5 star hotels in Chandigarh, one of the nicest is the Piccadily Hotel which is a bit of a hub for business professionals from all over the world. Their top notch suites provide a very comfortable to enjoy, that is also close to everything in the city.

The Whole Hoverboard Madness

It’s always interesting to look back at recent fads, and marvel at how they come and go so quickly. I suppose with the progression of technology, and the growth of the internet and social media, it’s no wonder that some new invention can just blow up over night. With technology moving as fast as it does, it makes most markets easy to get into for big companies, which in return brings the price down due to fierce competition.

One recent fad that took the world by storm was the whole “hoverboard” craze. I think what really sold the hoverboard idea to the younger generation was when you saw all the celebrities and internet personalities using them and being proud of them. It became almost like a item that changed your social status. The downside of it all is that the hoverboards were actually quite expensive when they first came out, then after time all the chinese models really brought the price down. With the price going down, obviously there were some problems with the quality of the products, so things like batteries blowing up and units melting down actually became a thing.

The fad blew up so swiftly that, almost over night people started hating on them and people that used them. Maybe there’s some jealously working there, but for the most part, I think the overall consensus is that anyone caught using a hoverboard is basically a sellout. You are a dummy that fell for the lame, short-lived teenage fad.

The Easy Way Out for Weight Loss

There comes a time in many people’s life when they decide enough is enough – it’s time to loss weight.

This is especially common at the beginning of the year because is running on a New Year’s Resolution high, and are more motivated than usual when it comes to major decisions like weight loss, or giving up cigarettes. Some stick to their resolution until the end, but the vast majority give up on their resolution rather quickly. Most of the time it’s because they create a goal without really thinking about how to achieve it.

For instance let’s talk about weight loss as a New Year’s resolution. The end of December is coming up, you’ve just enjoyed the holidays with your family and friends, eating big meals at the family gatherings. Then you reflect on the fact that you wouldn’t hate losing a a couple pounds, and maybe the New Year is just what you needed to get yourself motivated.

So you do what most other people would do, you get a gym membership. Now I’m not saying it’s a bad idea to get a gym membership, but what I am trying to say is that it’s only half the battle. The other half is learning how to eat proper meals. Without a regular diet, working out at a gym could result in much smaller gains than if you were eating and resting properly.

Some might even try a shortcut like forskolin weight loss – it’s like another one of those plant extracts that promises to do this and that, and especially help with easy weight loss. So in the end, it makes sense that someone might turn to forskolin to cheat their way to weight loss, but even if the stuff does work, you still haven’t done anything to strengthen your discipline to live a healthy lifestyle.

Does Anyone Know If These Things Are Even Real

Has anyone ever signed up for some type of free giveaway or sweepstakes, and actually won anything? Shit, has anyone even heard of someone else actually winning? The way I see it, there must be some type of catch, because who would just give away money for nothing? That’s right – no one. So what are these sites up to? Let’s take a closer look shall we?

First, let’s start off with examining an example site. For now let’s use this site that offers it’s visitor’s a chance to win a ps 4. Notice how it says nothing about what your chances of winning are, they don’t mention how your information will be used… in fact, it doesn’t really say anything at all. Now, I’m not exactly sure whether or not the site is authentic, but at the end of the day it has got to make you wonder. What is the point of it all?

While I am not an expert in the field of scamming gullible people, however I’m inclined to believe that most of them are either getting you to fill out surveys that the website owner gets profit from, as well as probably spamming your email or phone number – or even worse – selling/sharing your information with others so there may be many people spamming you. Nowadays we get enough shit thrown at us on a daily basis, do you really need to add more annoyances to your life?

Moral of the story is, think twice before entering some type of giveaway or sweepstakes. Use your common sense and see if it has the signs of being legit: having all the rules and conditions on the signup page, and stating clearly how your information will be used. Without those it’s almost always going to be some type of scam or some non-regulated promotions.

Do Normal People Smoke Cigars Too?

The current year is 2017 – who still smokes cigars? It seems like when you think of smoking a cigar, it would be either while celebrating a special occasion, or while hanging out at the good ole boys club. I typically imagine some guy sitting in his library, that’s in a secluded part of his massive mansion. Fireplace dimly light in front of him that his butler has prepared for him, and a drink on his antique nightstand to his left. Let’s not forget about his zebra-hide rug beneath his priceless chair that was handed down through his family. Of course he has a foot stand to rest his feet on, and yes you guessed it, his foot stand is also the best humidor that he could get delivered to his estate.

I guess the truth is though that there are still average joe guys out there that choose to wind down their day with a nice cigar. Maybe they were gifted some nice cuban ones that are almost sentimental, if you can imagine that. Maybe cigar smokers in general just get a bad wrap because of all the snobby, high society people out there that think they’re better than everyone else because they’re pretending to enjoy a $100 cigar.

The Most Extravagant Wallpapers Ever

So the other night I was alone browsing the internet for some specials or deals during this holiday season. I typically don’t venture over to Pinterest because I find most of the stuff so spammy, and I’m not even into women’s fashion anyway so what’s the point. Anyway, somehow I stumbled over there while looking for ideas of how to spice up my living quarters some. Turns out there is a whole world out there that I didn’t even know about – the world of amazing wallpapers. I came across this post for a website of wallpaper Singapore, and literally everything they have, you want to buy.

Not only are the wallpapers cool and modern, but they also have vinyl flooring and mural art. The mural art was what I was originally looking for, but after seeing the styles and selection of wallpapers that they have, it has made me second guess everything I’ve been thinking. They have these awesome wallpapers that look like real textures, like stone and brick walls. They even have some vintage wallpapers that are to die for – but they aren’t the traditional vintage you’re thinking about, they’re more like a modern take on old time wallpaper styles.

My idea is to find a wallpaper supplier here in the States that can sell me some stone wall wallpaper. What do you guys think?


Finding a Rental When Traveling Abroad

This sort of has to do with my time traveling earlier. Like I mentioned before traveling to India was an amazing experience, not in a white school girl’s sense of amazing, but it really was a chance to get a better understanding of how other countries and cultures operate. The patterns and mannerisms are very interesting when you really focus on them. All of that is great of course, but it’s not like you just book a plane there and go check it out – you need to plan your trip WAY ahead of time, to figure out the optimum period to go so that you can experience everything that you want to. Beyond that, you need to be sure you aren’t over-paying for everything. If you are staying somewhere abroad for an extended period of time, I would highly suggest you find a rental car to use.

If you haven’t done any research about rentals in other countries then you should check out a CarTrawler Booking to get a better idea of what the rates are in the area you want to visit. Even if you aren’t comfortable with booking the actual car over the internet, it will at least give you a solid idea of what you should be paying so you won’t get ripped off when you go to rent in person. People often underestimate the power of negotiation when overseas because they are used to it not being a thing from shopping in big brand stores.

Greasy Face Syndrome

Have you ever been walking down the street on the sunny day when you are suddenly blinded by the sun reflecting off someone’s greasy-ass forehead? Ever seen a picture of someone and there’s a lens glare coming off the forehead because of the face bouncing off the layer of grease?

Sure it’s fun to poke fun at it, especially if you don’t personally have to struggle with it. I mean for real, dealing with forehead pimples is probably one of the most annoying and embarrassing problems to deal with. People will look at you like you are some unkempt moron that can’t even manage to give his face a scrub once or twice a day. When in actuality, there are some people that have actual biological circumstances that make a shiny face almost inevitable. These are the real people you should feel bad for.

I’d rather have my eyes burned out by someone’s greasy forehead over having a massive zit on my face any day.


Soccer Fans in the City

Let’s face the facts, football, or as we Muricans call it, soccer, is just not that popular of a sport. You walk into a Buffalo Wild Wings and what do you see? Catching an MLS game there would be one thing since it’s an American League, but it would be downright impossible to find an English Premier League game. Hooters and Winghouse? Don’t even think about it.

If you’re like me and are looking to spectate a sport that is just a class above the average American swine, then you’re forced to watch online from something like a Manchester United stream. God knows what the quality is going to be like, but anything is better than throwing more money at the cable company for some unnecessary sports package.

WTF Furniture

Being in the city you see all sorts of wacky shit. The other day this guy was talking about how he has a horse water trough on his deck that he likes to relax in when the whether is right.


He mentioned it being over 120 gallons, but still, you’re almost better off with a kiddie pool from Walmart. On top of that (no pun intended), you can’t even fit 2 people in it. Pretty much a complete waste of space, but I guess this is what people do when they want to be the edgiest ever.

What is it going to be next?

Having an old chicken coop as a book shel-

I should stop before I give them anymore ideas.

Worth it to get a drone?

Coming up to my trip, I had many thoughts about getting some sort of drone to help record some memorable shots while I’m out and about. The only real downfall to this idea is the actual fact that I would need to carry around a massive case that it’s usually stored in. So basically it would look like some crazy guy running around with a metallic case full of butt plugs.

I was lurking about the internet looking at random outdoor quadcopter reviews and realized this is what I was really looking for. If I was going to get something like a drone, it better not be too pricey since I feel like I will inevitably crash it into something at some point. At the same time, maybe if I purchase some cheap one it’ll just break on it’s own before I get a chance to ruin it.

In the end I opted to not purchase one seeing as it would just be too much effort and I could better use the funds to party with locals.

It’s been a while

So it’s definitely been a while since I fired up the blog but I wanted to get back to business. I recently had a visit to India, where I explored quite a bit (being cautious of course). Luckily I had a tour guide that knows all the good places to visit, and I didn’t have to waste my time really mapping out the entire trip or aimlessly wandering around.

I have many stories from the trip as you can imagine, but one thing I wanted to touch on real fast was the Golden Temple Vellore in Thirumalaikodi Village.

Just by the name you can probably start to picture in your head what it might be – a golden temple. I think at this point some of us have been desensitized to the glory of these magnificent places because movies and TV shows cram it down our throats.

I have to say…this place is on another level. It apparently took seven years just to finish the construction of this place – and it’s pretty much all gold. Needless to say it’s the largest temple of it’s kind in the world, and consists of 1.5 tons of pure gold.


I highly suggest anyone interested in traveling to India to take some time to visit this amazing temple. Just being in the area was like being in a different world.

Be sure to take notes on the rules and expected manners you should maintain while on the grounds.

PS Sorry for no pictures from there but phones and cameras were not permitted while I was there.

Monday, June 30, 2008

You Asked For It

It’s been almost two months and people have been hounding me for a fresh, new blog entry. The wait is over, and I’ve written a whopper! After wrestling with many possible gay-pride-related topics that would ultimately end up being viewed as fluff, I decided to share a fun little story about a recent experience on public transport.

A very attractive young man turned to me during a train ride last week. I didn’t know how to react at first. It was one of those moments that every awkward young man dreams of. I thought to myself: “YES! Cute people DO want to talk to me!”

Him: Do you have a minute?
Me: Yeah.
My thought: Oh fuck yeah!
Him: My name is Daniel.
Me: I’m Richie.
Him: I was looking at you just now and I thought you’d be perfect for our group. A bunch of other guys like me meet up every week…
My thought: ::drool::
Him: … and reach out to the world through our savior’s teachings.

The beautiful, steel grey-eyed hunk of a man was a God warrior, one of three things I hate to encounter when I'm on public transport. The other two are hobos and drunk girls.

There are four tactics that I use at the gay bars whenever I encounter a creepy man who wants a slice of my pie and I don’t feel like sharing. Surprisingly, these tactics can also be used against God warriors, Jehovah’s Witnesses, and Mormons.

  1. Giving fake contact information.
  2. Politely excusing yourself to the restroom so you can make an escape.
  3. Saying that you have a boyfriend.
  4. Letting on that you are mildly interested, then starting to pick your nose.

I opted for the third tactic, announcing that I had a boyfriend. How would he react when I told him that I wasn’t attracted to people with self-lubricating genitals? I thought that would do the trick, and watching the color drain from Daniel’s face left me with the same satisfied feeling I get when I tell children that there’s no such thing as Santa Claus. But Daniel quickly regained his composure and inundated me with questions about the validity of my homosexuality.

“How do you know that you’re really gay?” he asked. Before I could answer, he tried to draw parallels between my homosexuality and some dude from the bible who built an army for God. The only parallel I could see was the fact that both me and the soldier were constantly surrounded by men who haven’t seen women in ages, but I digress.

I can go on for hours about the fifteen minute conversation - nay, clash of faiths – between me and the annoyingly handsome (and possibly sex-starved) God warrior. We kept invalidating each other’s arguments with even more intriguing arguments much in the same way that Daffy Duck pulled a gun on Marvin the Martian, but Marvin pulls out a ray gun, then Daffy pulls out an even bigger gun, then Marvin pulls out an enormous cannon, until the weapons get bigger than the actual planet. It was getting out of hand.

In an attempt to end the madness and to get my mind off of the fact that he suggested that homosexuality is indeed a choice (because he talked to a lot of experts on homosexuality), I proposed a compromise. I would agree to meet with his little God warrior group and listen to what they had to say if he would agree to come with me to a gay bar and ask the patrons there if they chose to be gay. His response: “I won’t do that.”

I asked him why, and he said “because where I come from, that isn’t acceptable.”

I said: “where I come from, that’s called a double standard.” I told him that we’d reached an impasse and politely excused myself. And with that, I got up and exited the train. It was four stops away from my actual stop, but I just had to get out of there.

I’ve probably missed out on every major march on Washington for gays and lesbians, every hate crime protest, and every gay marriage campaign since I came out eleven years ago. But that day on the train, I felt like there was an opportunity to contribute to the cause in some small way by defending my own homosexuality. Aggressors toward homosexuality don’t always stand on podiums in Washington or run the Americans for Truth campaign. Sometimes they look cute and try to chat you up on the train. Be prepared to defend yourself!

It’s good to be back.

Friday, May 09, 2008

Made only from rags, but I wore it so proudly

I always told myself that if Dolly Parton ever went on tour, I'd sew a coat of many colors to wear to her concert. My boyfriend and I had been working on our coats for weeks, and I have to admit that I was a little apprehensive about wearing a patchwork coat in public. After telling someone about the idea, they said that I'd look like I was wearing a clown coat and that people would make fun of me. Every stitch I sewed after hearing that made me ever squeamish about doing it.

I didn't think I'd wear it out, but I did (thanks to the diligent efforts of the boyfriend who spent his whole day finishing it for me). As soon as I put it on, all of the apprehension melted away and I marched toward the Chicago Theater with my head held high. A lot of people stared, but the stares were accompanied by smiles and seemingly genuine gasps of astonishment. Fans at a Dolly Parton concert are some of the nicest folks around, and no one said one negative thing about my coat that evening.

After Dolly sang "Coat of Many Colors," a crazy man ran up onto the stage and showed Dolly his own coat of many colors and I fumed. Have you ever seen what happens when two gay boys wear the same thing to a party? One of them ends up leaving with scratch marks on his face. But things weren't that serious at the concert. I didn't run up to the stage to show my coat off to her like he did, but part of me wishes that I did.

People loved the coat and complimented me and my boyfriend on the effort, which was good enough for me. What was more important was that there was a lot of love stitched into the coat on his behalf, much like the coat that Dolly's mother made for her.

After the concert, the woman sitting behind the crazy man came up to me and asked why I didn't go up and show mine up against his. The crazy man's coat only had about four colors, whereas mine had about 5,000 colors. But pointing something like that out is the Sin of Pride, and Dolly wouldn't approve of that behavior. We did get a good laugh out of the whole thing because she and the rest of her friends sitting next to her had dubbed him "The Freak of Many Colors."

Oh no, that's the Sin of Wrath! Don't tell Dolly!

Thursday, April 10, 2008


Parking cars on the lawn isn't the tackiest thing I've ever seen.

I was one of 78 people who got an e-vite this week for a "Spring Kickoff Martini Party." This is from someone I barely know. In the opening line of the e-vite, he states that he's got a martini shaker that is "just itching to be used" and I had a sneaking suspicion that he actually intended that tag line for the e-vite to his big gay orgy.

Invitees were also informed that this party is strictly BYOB and due to a large number of invites, people are advised to provide their own glassware.

Let me get this gay: He's inviting me to a martini party but I have to bring my own liquor AND my own martini glass. How tacky is that?

Fortunately, not one of the 78 invitees has agreed to attend. It always makes me happy to know that you can't always pull the wool over everyone's eyes the same way that Big Momma and Juwanna Mann try to do in those films.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Sushi Survivor

I remember watching talk shows like Sally Jessy Raphael and making fun of the deluded women who pined over the men who abused them. It would always be a man who emotionally abused a woman by talking down to her, taking her money, and making her wait for him while he was doing god knows what. The abused woman would also comment about not being satisfied by the man, which would always surprise me because most of the men who do the emotional abusing would be very attractive. After repeated abuse, the woman would always go back to the man because he'd offer her something that she couldn't refuse like empty promises or something shiny. Audience members would goad the abused woman, asking her why she kept going back to the man and she'd reply: BECAUSE I LOVE HIM. It would be years before I truly understood what the abused woman was going through.

I went to eat at a sushi restaurant called Tank this past weekend. I'd been there many times before and it's not always my first choice, but I hadn't been there in a while so I thought I'd give it another chance. No matter who is at the helm of Tank's host podium, you can always count on being treated like you're a street urchin who'd just wandered into Cartier. They never greet you, but just coldly ask: "How many?" as they roll their eyes and usher you to the back of the room where they throw the menus on the table and walk away like they just lost thirty seconds of their life that they totally could have used to file their nails or treat someone else like shit.

If you're wearing a rabbit's foot and a four leaf clover, you'll be lucky enough to get seated in less than 45 minutes (even though there are always empty tables). Be sure to take a picture of your waiter because you'll be going so long without seeing him or her that you'd need it to remember who exactly you have to kill to get a refill on your $3.00 soft drink.

We couldn't read the menus because it's so poorly lit inside Tank. It was like being in an actual tank. I almost had a heart attack when I saw how they'd raised their prices. The soft shell crab roll is $14.00 at Tank and it doesn't even give you the power to become invisible like it should for that amount of money.

The music is so loud in there that people have to yell at each other in order to be heard. It gets so loud that you sometimes think that you're in a noisy cafeteria, but with better wall decor. It doesn't help that all of the tables are so close together that you end up backhanding someone when you gesture during the climax of a funny story involving fantastic sex and parachute cord.

We waited for 58 minutes before our food arrived and we scarfed it all down in nine minutes. Afterward, we were still hungry. We'd wasted almost two hours, we were treated poorly, and we weren't satisfied. I remembered that this is why I hate going there and that I'd said this so many times before, yet I still come back. Suddenly I realized that I was that abused woman on Sally Jessy Raphael.

Whenever I tell people about my terrible experiences at Tank, they ask me why I keep going back. I tell them that I love the sushi.

The rude host, the ungodly amount of time we spent waiting for something that ultimately didn't satisfy us, the fact that the prices were prime examples of highway robbery, and my inexplicable love for the accursed ambrosia after all of the harrowing experiences are all consistent with the talk shows like Sally Jessy where audience members tell the abused ones to "kick him to the curb!"

I'm sure that Tank is aware of this and that's why they've got that one thing that keeps people coming back for more. There's that one thing that is just so attractive that it makes people forget all of the emotional distress and allows them to justify any future turmoil. With the abusive men, it's the promise to buy the abused woman a romantic trip to Branson, Missouri. With Tank, it's half price sushi on Saturdays and Sundays. We need to wake up and smell the mental anguish!

There are a lot of wonderful men out there who are better than the slime balls you used to see on Sally Jessy and you have to understand that the same is true for sushi restaurants. In the long run, you'll be a much happier and better-adjusted person if you just close your eyes and make the leap.

In the rare moment of lucidity after leaving Tank that day, I gave my friends permission to shoot me if I ever mentioned the desire to go to Tank again.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008


It's been difficult to write blog entries that are new and exciting, so I decided to use one of those online topic generators to help things along. The first prompt that came up read "list things that are very important to you." This was indeed a stroke of fortune because I think that listing things that are important to me will help people understand the uniqueness of this blog. To keep things simple, I'll just make a numbered list and discuss each item.

  • It's important to stay informed about current events. The three most important letters in the world are "C N N." Nobody cares about what goes on in Port Charles because the world is waiting to see what witty things are going to come out of Anderson Cooper's mouth. I watch so much CNN that the logo is burned into the bottom left hand corner of my television screen.
  • Too much technology is a bad thing. Our ancestors didn't have Tivo and they were able to survive. How much more fun can you have reading The Da Vinci Code for the fifteenth time instead of mindlessly tapping away at a Nintendo DS? LOTS!
  • Never have a one night stand with someone you picked up at a bar. Bar chastity is one of the few unspoiled treasures that gay men have. If you start spreading your legs for any hot man who buys you shots of Jim Bean, then the whole community will start whispering behind your back like you were in elementary school: "Raunchy Richie whose crotch is itchy. He's such a whore and he's always bitchy!" Take my advice and don't go out to bars thinking that sex is the only thing that matters.
  • I love having sex with women. Every time I have sex with my boyfriend, I imagine that I'm a Dutch soccer player and that he's a girl with a strap on. I love the softness of a woman and the way her body trembles when I take her to that moment of ecstasy as our bodies undulate in an explosion of sexual energy.
  • I especially love April Fools Day. And if you haven't already figured out that this post is a joke, then you don't know me as well as you think you do!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

This is not what I meant when I said "Exposed Wood!"

If you're like the other dirty birds in Chicago, then you're probably hard up for places to go when you want anonymous gay sex in the mid morning. Foster Beach isn't warm enough during this time of year. The back room at The Ram does open at 9:30 A.M., but all of the better-looking felchers don't show up until after six. So what's a fella to do? He goes to the nearest Home Depot!

I went to the Home Depot today to pick up some trim and was surprised to find that there wasn't a lesbian in sight, what with all of the jokes about the lesbians loving the Home Depot. I really think that they're doing a great job of catering to the gay clientèle with all of the cute boys they've got in the customer service area and all the sassy, big-bootied black women ringing people up at the registers. Everyone knows that sassy black women make the best fag hags and that lots of gay men fantasize about customer service butt sex. But I digress.

There are a lot of dark corners in the lumber section, (which is surprising when you consider how much fluorescent lighting that place has) and I had the unfortunate pleasure of witnessing a man briskly walking away from another man who was zipping his pants back up when I passed by. It didn't take a rocket scientist to know that I'd interrupted a public sex act. It turns out that I wasn't the only queen in the Home Depot looking for some trim!

I do notice that I get a lot of hungry stares from the men who shop there. At first I thought it was because they didn't think that it was right for Asian/Hispanic hybrids to do home improvement, but now I realize that it's because they possibly wanted a piece of my pie.

I guess I shouldn't be all that shocked to discover that sort of thing going on at Home Depot. When you think about it, the whole home improvement genre is rife with sexual innuendo. Things get nailed, screwed, and you sometimes use a tool called a 'stud finder.'

Thursday, March 20, 2008

You Spell Potato

Someone named Jen was nice enough to bring this to my attention:
I was just surfing the web and I came across your website and I have to tell you that you've been misspelling the word Oblogitory. It should be Oblogatory with an "A" not an "O" because the word Obligatory has an "A". That's all.
I only inherited two things from my mother. One is the gene that causes male pattern baldness and the other is the need to point out when someone is wrong. I'm going to use one of these gifts here today.

Sorry, Jen. While you do raise an excellent point, I must point out that "Oblogitory" is not a word, so there is no way that I could have misspelled it. In this case, it's a proper noun that doubles as a neologism. If there's something that just has to be addressed in blog form, it's Oblogitory.