Defending the Oldest Profession

I was sad to see that the website hookonline.org had been taken down. It was an online resource for men who work in the sex industry, complete with articles, how-to guides (how to tell whether or not your John is an undercover cop), tips on successful prostituting, and the locations of various shelters and law offices that specialize in helping people in the sex industry. I'd never be a successful prostitute, but the website was a lot of fun to read and it also had cute little graphics.

Whenever people think of prostitutes, they always think: dirty, diseased, low-self esteem, sexually-depraved, and money hungry. Those are negative stereotypes, propagated by narrow minded people who don't see the big picture. Not all prostitutes are like that, the same way that not all Catholic priests enjoy molesting young altar boys.

If you could pick a prostitute and have sex with him without fear of how you'd look if people found out that you were paying for sex, would you want someone who is dirty, diseased, and mentally unbalanced? Of course not. Nobody wants to do a skanky coke whore who looks like he may never wake up if he fall asleep next to you. People want hot, clean, polite prostitutes who don't overcharge, and I think that the sex industry has responded to that.

If you take a look at the website, rentboy.com, or visit the street corner of Halsted and Waveland in Chicago, you'll find that a majority of male sex workers don't look like the brothel boys you see depicted in low-budget gay films. They're cute, they'll make you feel like a king, and they give the best massages this side of the Mason-Dixon Line. I happen to know a few rent boys and I must say that they are a pleasure to be around. I also enjoy looking at the bulges in their pants.

Perhaps the BEST argument that defends prostitutes comes from Laurie Kilmartin in one of her stand-up routines. She says that they perform a great public service "by having sex with creepy guys so that we don't have to. Better you for fifty than me for free."

So the next time you go to a party and you find out that one of the other guests is a prostitute, don't shun him. Give him a pat on the back and thank him for making our world a better place.